


Fantasy

by hungry_hobbits



Category: The Terror (TV 2018)
Genre: Anal Sex, Dinner With A Friend Becomes Something Else, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Semi-Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2018-06-17
Packaged: 2019-05-24 03:28:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14946728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hungry_hobbits/pseuds/hungry_hobbits
Summary: Even the gentle Dr. Goodsir has wants and needs...





	1. Tell Me

**Author's Note:**

> (This isn't the porn-y chapter.)

Often Goodsir found himself seated at the captain’s table, his presence being warmly welcomed by both Sir John and Fitzjames. It was such an honor, one he felt did not befit him. Though in that time he was not seated as Erebus’ assistant surgeon, but as a naturalist. His notes and drawings would be spread across the flawless wooden surface and preened over by Sir John’s aging but careful hands. Fitzjames looked at specimens with quiet delight, as the sciences had always attracted him.

Their fingers grazed with the passing of pencils and journals. Glances were exchanged as numerously as notes and papers across the table. Goodsir found his evenings were spent more and more with Captain Fitzjames, when said captain was not sharing dinner with his superiors or his officers, of course.

He found he was comfortable in Fitzjames’ presence. While on land he was rather personable, his gentle voice and studious charm was always remarked upon by his siblings and colleagues. It was what helped get him his position as the conservator of the Surgeons’ Hall Museum (with a bit of input from his brother, John, of course). But on the ship he was out of place; nervous and quiet, afraid to be in the way or to offend. It had left him feeling lonely and out of sorts.

Thankfully no one had yet been cruel to him, although Stanley had seen to being less than kind. Fitzjames assured him that that was just how Stanley was, noting their time together in China when Stanley cruelly fished a musket ball from his back. Fitzjames, much to the good doctor’s surprise, took to him instantly. He would bring sloshing buckets of creatures to his superior’s room, a cloth spread out across the little table so the captain could get a closer look at mollusks and Crustacea while the two of them sketched and laughed over the slimy surfaces and wriggling movements. A man like that, so beautiful and intelligent, noticing and enjoying him…

It was _wonderful_.

Goodsir found himself wanting more from his relationship with Fitzjames. Something beyond friendship and admiration. He found himself wondering things one should not wonder about his captain.

Things that could get a man into _trouble_.

These thoughts were not even _lewd_ and yet they still left Goodsir with a blush. This was no bawdy, steamy melodrama. Just the softness of a kiss, the touch of a hand to a cheek, the carding of fingers through hair.

 

“Harry, my good man, is everything alright?” Fitzjames’ voice broke through the doctor’s thoughts and snapped him back to reality. He had nearly forgotten they were dining together that night. The captain laughed, “You looked to be miles away. Am I really that boring, doctor?”

“N-No sir, of course not. I was just thinking…”

“May I ask what about?”

“I would rather you did not.” His reply put a quirk into one of Fitzjames’ brows. “That is to say, you should not waste breath asking, as it is not of importance.”

“I am always interested in the things you have to say, Harry. You need not keep things from me. You are amongst friends at this table.”

 _Friends_. Yes of course, they were friends. That was what Goodsir was worried about. Fitzjames seemed keen on being the only man in all of Erebus to refer to Goodsir by his preferred name, and yet every time he said it, it made Goodsir’s heart flutter. A flutter that should not have been elicited by one man saying the name of his friend.

“Forgive my prying, but you seem terribly preoccupied this evening. Have you been getting enough rest?” Fitzjames rested his carved jaw on the crook of his hand, thumb pressed against one of the lines that dug handsomely into his face. There was concern laced in his voice and knitted into his brow. “I recall you saying something about insomnia?” Fitzjames talked, more trying to grab Goodsir’s attention back to him instead of whatever land he was fantasizing in, “Did you know that Captain Crozier suffers from insomnia as well? Sir John was telling me about it the other day.”

Goodsir gave a quick nod, “Yes I’m privy to most of the medical histories of all the captains of our expedition’s ships. I have to be.”

“I suppose you know my body very well, then? Seeing as you’re one of my doctors.”

“Not as well as one would _like_.” Goodsir’s head immediately shot up, gaze meeting with Fitzjames’. He did not say that. _He did not say that_. “Th-That is to say… What I _meant_ to say was… That came out wrong.”

There was a silence that was only mildly interrupted by the soft clink of silverware being laid upon fine china.

“Tell me, Harry,” Fitzjames leaned forward. He pushed his plate daintily to the side and in its place rested his elbows so that he may more squarely look at the doctor, “what fantasies have been occupying that intricate mind of yours?”

“Fantasies? I-I have no idea what you mean.”

“Oh do not play coy. You’re not very good at it.” Fitzjames rolled his jaw as he did when he was irritated or in thought. It always made his face look just a touch more serious. “Do not play coy.”

“I-I assure you, James,” the lump in Goodsir’s throat refused to go down no matter how hard he swallowed. His mouth felt painfully dry. He was having a hard time discerning Fitzjames’ tone. Was this anger? His face did not read as angry, though the captain’s eyes felt as if they were burrowing into his skull.

 

It was then that Fitzjames stood. He towered over Goodsir while the man was seated, making his movement to close the gap between them in the third captain’s room that much more intimidating. Was he irritated? Was he going to open the door and bid a rather stern goodnight to the doctor? Would Goodsir be allowed back, for dinner? For meetings? Into the captain’s good graces?

Goodsir felt his body tensing with anxiety. Every muscle in his body seemed to lock up and yet he still managed to crane his head up to meet Fitzjames once the man took his place beside the seated doctor.

And then, _it happened_. A hand, with its long fingers somehow smooth and left without callouses despite years on the sea and the battlefield, found itself a place just so to tuck under the doctor’s bearded jaw. The thumb of his captain ever so gently grazed along Goodsir’s bottom lip, leaving the doctor with nothing to say and widening eyes.

“ _As I said_ ,” A smirk spread along his angular face, and Goodsir realized that Fitzjames was, of all things, pleased. “You are not very good at playing coy. And you are far less good at hiding your interests. When something grabs your attention, you become invested. And something has certainly grabbed your attention, has it not? Well, I correct myself. As it is not some _thing_ more as it is some _one_.”

Blood rushed to the doctor’s face and he silently wished his heart would stop beating so hard, as he feared Fitzjames would hear it as well as he could hear it in his own ears. Had he heard him correctly? Did the captain know of his desires? A silly question of course, why else would they be situated in this very position.

“Do not go silent on me now, Harry.”

“I’m merely taking a moment,” his voice waivered and soften, “you’ve left me a bit out of sorts.”

Fitzjames laughed again. That laugh caused a bit of tension to leave Goodsir’s body, much to his relief. Perhaps the captain felt it, the tension leaving the other’s jaw, as his own hand relaxed as well.

“I’m not sure if I’ve ever left you speechless, doctor.”

“Not speechless, but you’ve certainly left me mesmerized…” Goodsir reached with a tentative hand with the intention of taking Fitzjames by the wrist. He guided the man’s fingers closer to his lips, kissing them individually and collectively. He moved to kiss the palm, then the wrist. He could feel Fitzjames’ pulse against his lips, counting the beats. His heart was pounding alongside the doctor’s, so it seemed. “Your skin is softer than I imagined.”

“So you have had fantasies about me?”

“How could I not?” Goodsir paused his sentence to place more gentle kisses against Fitzjames’ flesh, “You are one of the most handsome men I’ve ever laid eyes upon. I cannot help but think of you nearly night and day.” He knew Fitzjames loved to be complimented, but to be able to say this felt like a burden lifting from his shoulders. His feelings could finally be expressed to the object of his romantic and physical desire, now that he knew a similar desire was shared between them.

“Tell me then,” Fitzjames spoke softly now, “what your fantasies are.”


	2. Show Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't written smut in ages so forgive any awkward clunkiness!!

In this moment his fantasies seemed so innocent, yet at the same time felt as though they were not. Time seemed to slow down. To dream of going further was to get into murky territory as to what society deemed appropriate. It was something Goodsir had only ever indulged a few times in his life, being that he was someone who was attracted to men. Of course Fitzjames was no ordinary man, nor was this an ordinary situation. In the confines he was allotted a bit of freedom, even if they had to be a bit more careful because of close quarters.

In a surprising streak of boldness, Goodsir decided to _act_ rather than _speak_. He stood, still shorter than his captain but that did not matter in the moment. His fingers finally carded through Fitzjames’ brown locks, feeling their softness before ushering his face forward and lower so that they might finally share a tender kiss.

As clichéd as it would be to say that such an act set off sparks within Goodsir’s person, it would also be just as true. The act felt right, it came naturally, and within a time he felt Fitzjames moving his hands if only to get a better hold on the doctor. He pressed closer to his superior, soaking in his warmth and the moment.

They kissed, tenderly at first as they were simply gaining a feel for one another, then with a feverish neediness that could only be warranted of two men stuck on a ship with no intimate contact with another human for near a year. Noses were left a bit crushed, teeth were bumped into, but nevertheless it was a wonderful experience. Goodsir guided their bodies back towards the captain’s bed and ceasing the kissing once he felt the thud of Fitzjames’ legs hitting the wood of his bed.  They laughed together. _Oh how I love that laugh_ , Goodsir mused, _I could listen to it every day of my life_. It was followed by the wonderfully awkward and fumbling act of undressing in the heat of passion.

 

Goodsir took a moment to gaze upon the gorgeous form that was a naked Commander James Fitzjames. The man laid in his bunk, like a painted angel in the dim cabin lighting. He did not illicit the feelings or image of a man who had been wounded in war or spent a good portion of his life walking the wood of a ship. The man’s soft skin was not limited to just his hands. His body was near hairless, decorated with light nicks and scars from years of service, the most notable scar being the one on his arm (and its twin on the back of his ribs). The doctor’s body was a striking opposite to his captain’s; a chest of dark, curly hair trailing down to his nethers. It decorated his pale arms and legs as well. Where Fitzjames was of a healthy weight, Goodsir had a bit of pudge to his midsection.

“I’m not sure what I was expecting upon seeing you undressed,” Fitzjames put a hand to his chin in apparent thought, clearly studying Goodsir’s body as much as the doctor was studying him, “but it certainly wasn’t all _that_.” He motioned to the doctor’s hairy torso with a surprised wave of the hand.

“Would you believe me if I said this was not the first time I have heard that?”

“Would it hurt your feelings if I said no?”

They laughed together to help disperse the nerves. As passionate as they had been, there was still a nervous energy. They had gone too far to turn back, not that either one of them would dream of stopping what they had begun. There just always ran a risk with these types of things. Someone overhearing, someone barging in, not to mention Sir John in the next room over. They were talking low enough that it shouldn’t have been an issue to a passerby, but getting to the act would be trickier. Fitzjames was used to it, being sneaky with his rendezvous on ships. He knew how to silence himself, stifle a moan just in time. For Goodsir it was different, having all his affairs on dry land and in the empty rooms of occupied buildings where things were less tightly packed. He did not carry the same restraint, and it was a factor to take into consideration.

 

This was something that Goodsir desperately wanted. He wouldn’t let this opportunity slip through his fingers. Whether it be a one-time fling or the blossoming of something more, it did not entirely matter in the moment. (Of course his feelings, more so his _heart_ , would say otherwise.)

“I never anticipated getting this far,” Goodsir’s voice softened, “this is a bit off the course for me.”

“I can imagine. You don’t seem the particularly spontaneous type.” Fitzjames smirked coyly as he dug one lazy hand through his bedside drawer, producing a tin of Vaseline for the pair to make use of. He gave it a playful toss, and threw his head back mirthfully when Goodsir nearly failed to catch it. “Oh come now, Harry, my dear. Time is of the essence.”

Goodsir nodded. This moment was out of character for him, as Fitzjames had implied. His romances were usually slow and careful. That did not mean he lacked experience. He was methodical and tender in his way of doing things. He approached the edge of the bed, angling himself so that Fitzjames would still be comfortable even with his long legs draped around the doctor’s waist.

Still smirking, Fitzjames hooked his ankles behind Goodsir’s back, making eye contact and soft moans while he was prepped with the deft fingers of a skilled anatomist. “You _have_ done this before.” His back arched, a gentle whine escaping him as the doctor prepared him.

“I am an anatomist first and foremost, after all. I’m very well versed when it comes to the human body.”

 

As smooth as he sounded, it was merely to mask the nerves building up in Goodsir’s stomach. He was already half hard from the sight of Fitzjames’ naked body, and with the captain watching him he used his greased fingers to stroke himself to full stiffness. He had never touched himself like this in front of someone and felt a bit awkward about the whole thing. But Fitzjames was waiting, and there was no time to concern himself with thoughts of his masturbatory techniques.

He had a hard time figuring out what to do with his hands for a moment, his awkward fumbling once again eliciting a chuckle from Fitzjames. He finally decided, for now, to have a hand on the captain’s hip in order to steady the both of them. Goodsir looked to Fitzjames with his soft, dark eyes and spoke with a quiet voice, “Please let me know if I hurt you.”

“I will, _darling_.” Fitzjames practically purred the last word. If there was one thing James Fitzjames was good at, it was sounding sexy.

Goodsir swallowed audibly, giving the captain a nod before finally easing his cock inside Fitzjames’ well prepped hole. His breath hitched momentarily as he felt the warmth, and he heard a quiet noise come from Fitzjames as he slid the rest of the way inside of him.

“Is that…alright?”

“You really don’t have to go so slow. I won’t break in two with a bit of force.”

“Of course, I just want to be certain I don’t—”

“ _Harry_.” Fitzjames said his name rather firmly, “Just fuck me already.”

 

Goodsir nodded and felt his face heat up. It was unavoidably awkward in the beginning, as first times usually were. It was like that regardless of skill or merit; two people coming together for the first time always had mixed results. Goodsir’s pace was slow, attempting to let the two bodies to become used to the feeling of one another. He found himself looking to Fitzjames over and over for reassurance that no pain or discomfort was being caused. The captain used his legs to force Goodsir closer, grabbing him by the shoulders and meeting him half way. It threw off Goodsir’s rhythm, what little of it there was.

“Harry.” Fitzjames’ voice was soft and tender. It made the young doctor’s heart flutter just a bit.

“I-I’m sorry. I promise I’m not usually this…” Goodsir trailed off. He had no way to say his nerves were getting in the way of his performance.

Fitzjames did not miss a beat. It wasn’t hard to sense the tension, no matter how hard Goodsir tried to hide it. “Harry,” He propped himself up on his elbows and motioned with his hands, “let us… switch positions, hm? Why don’t you let me ride you? I think you’ll find yourself to be more comfortable.”

 _Ride?!_ Goodsir looked at his superior, pleasantly surprised and mildly bewildered, but of course he obliged.

 

It took a bit of untangling, but soon enough Goodsir found himself on his back in the captain’s bunk. The sheets smelled of soap and his perfume – gentle and flowery, definitely made of roses. Why a man would need to worry about smelling so nicely on a ship of men who sweat and grunt their way through the day would be lost on anyone else, but Goodsir understood Fitzjames’ need to feel put together, to look nice.

His cock was still stiff, though it was given a freshening up of grease by Fitzjames’ own hand as he sat with his knees on either side of the doctor’s hips. He then hiked himself up a bit, easing himself down the length of Goodsir’s member until there was no more to fit in. The captain moaned softly, looking at Goodsir with half-lidded, lusty eyes. His palms were put flat on the doctor’s chest to better balance himself. “Now, darling,” He purred his words sensually, “how does that feel?”

It took everything in the doctor to actually make himself speak. There was a heat building in the pit of his stomach, overwhelmed by such an erotic sight. Fitzjames was beautiful. He glistened with a light sheen of sweat that had built up from the heat in the stuffy room that was not built for two, his skin was pink with flush, and that _look_ , all of this was almost too much to bear.

“It feels… _amazing_.” Goodsir finally managed to gasp out. He once again was left without knowing what to do with his hands, so he placed them carefully on Fitzjames’ thighs. “You feel amazing.”

Fitzjames took this as the go ahead to continue, slowly rolling his hips to get a steady rhythm going once again. He was clearly in his element with this, knowing exactly how to move his body to get the most pleasure for the both of them. Fingernails dug into the doctor’s chest, fingers tangled in the curly hair there. Goodsir responded by gripping Fitzjames’ thighs. He pressed the back of his head into the captain’s pillow as the rhythmic grinding became a needy bouncing, aided by the doctor giving him a buck or two. Fitzjames moved his hands from Goodsir’s chest to his shoulders in order to steady himself further. A moan louder than intended slipped out, but it wasn’t as if Fitzjames wasn’t smart enough to make an excuse should someone come knocking.

The heat in Goodsir’s stomach was joined by a tightness of the muscles. “J-James I-I’m— _oh god_ I’m close!” He piped up. He desperately tried not to be so loud, but Fitzjames just felt so good, and it was hard to control his volume. He grabbed onto the captain’s cock in the hopes of helping him reach orgasm with him.

“ _Harry!_ ” Fitzjames let it slip, but could no longer keep the pace. He planted himself firmly against Goodsir’s hips, his rocking and bouncing ceasing as he let out a final moan before finally releasing onto the good doctor’s chest. Goodsir followed suit, the tightness of Fitzjames around him doing nothing to postpone it. They sat like that for several moments, waiting for the rush of their orgasms to die down before Fitzjames finally dismounted him.

 

Goodsir sat up, still dazed with a blissful expression on his face. Had that really happened? He felt a pair of lips against his reddened cheek, a soft kiss to snap him back to reality once more.

“Once again, I’ve nearly lost you.” Fitzjames chuckled and handed him a rag to clean off with as he cleaned himself up, “This is certainly the most exciting dinner I’ve had in quite some time. Well, there was one time—but now isn’t the time for stories.”

“That was incredible. You’re incredible. I’ve never…” Goodsir swallowed, looking a tad bit bashful despite everything, “I’ve never done something like _that_ before.”

“Well now you can say you have, if you’re the type to brag. Which I believe I can safely say you aren’t.” Still naked, Fitzjames sat beside him, spent but still radiant as always in the doctor’s eyes, “I’d like to do this again. Dinner and…well, other fun activities, hm? Perhaps I can teach you a few things, like you’ve taught me?” The captain put his lips to Goodsir’s ear, peppering it soft kisses before whispering hotly, “You can tell me about the rest of your fantasies.”

“I would like that. I would like that very much, James.”


End file.
